Obligatory New Year’s Reflections
Friday, December 31st, 2004Ok, time for the obligatory New Year’s post. My first one. I’m not sure if this is obligatory. I’ve just assumed so.
My New Year’s resolutions are usually pretty easy to accomplish. One year it was to not get hit by a bus. Another year it was to just have a less crappy year than the previous one. I’m kinda leaning towards that this time. I’m not much for silly specific ones. I’m for silly general ones. Except that bus thing. That was pretty specific.
So I’m going to ramble. I’m here at work and I finished all my work 2 hours ago. So I got nothing but time. On the last day of the year. That leads to rambling. But no one’s forcing you to read. So go somewhere else if you don’t want to read this garbage.
It’s been one of the craziest years of my life. I’ve had my self-confidence destroyed and slowly rebuilt. After making some profoundly stupid decisions, I picked up and moved across the country (to South Dakota) on a couple days’ notice. I was there when Bubba, our family’s 14 year-old Yorkshire Terrier, died. I got a new (used) car and a Mac. I got back in touch with Tracy after almost exactly one year with no contact at all. I moved to Minnesota and got a job in retail, which I swore I’d never do again, and at Sears, where I swore I’d never ever work again. My sister got married to my childhood friend. I was her (ahem) “Maid of Honor” and I made a toast that a couple hundred people seemed to like. And I still haven’t finished their wedding video (sorry). I wanted to give them their wedding video for Christmas, but instead I gave Lisa a Cornell West book and Pat an evil rubik’s cube. I quit smoking. I’m finally, after a year, living by myself again. And I’ve got a good, full-time job that I enjoy. Or at least it allows me to enjoy my free time. Same thing, as far as I’m concerned. By chance, I ran into an old friend whom I hadn’t seen for over ten years. Now we’re doing Flapping Crane. I’ve had to come to terms with some serious decisions I’ve made, and their effects on others. They’ve been insanely tough decisions, and I really don’t know if I’ve made the right choices. I surprised myself with some of them. I may try dating in the coming months, but I’m not sure my heart is in it.
I don’t really expect many of you to even read this far. I know only a few of you will. It’s just interesting to quantify a year like that. I thought 2003 was an insane year for me. It pales in comparison to this one. There’s been so many huge changes and strange coincidences.
This year I have, in a very real way, started over. Helping that along was recent events, which have forced me to realize that material things, no matter how sentimental, are really meaningless, and that it’s not worth fretting about.
I’ve got my family, my friends, and (for the most part) my health.
I don’t remember my resolution for last year, or the year before. Maybe the year before was the “have a less crappy year” one. I have a horrible memory (I’ll be writing about this soon; it’s been bothering me a lot lately). I’ll be no less general this year. But I’ll try to be more positive: I’m going to try to lead a good life, and to become a better person. I’ll try to be less selfish, and more thoughtful of others.
And exercise more. Damn office jobs where you sit on your butt all day can really mess you up, especially when you like beer.
Everyone, be safe this New Year’s Eve. Remember, when drinking, ask yourself, “Have I had half as much as Joe would drink?” If the answer is yes, it’s time to switch to water.
P.S. — How about that? A New Year’s post that isn’t, as Kurt described, drunken. Though it would probably be more entertaining that way. I probably won’t have the chance to write a drunken entry tonight, though I may do an audioblog or two that I’ll surely hastily delete tomorrow.
