It’s been over a year since I posted my video game stack of shame.
I haven’t done so well. I beat some games that weren’t on that list (Professor Layton and the Diabolical Box), but of the games that were, I can cross out “New Super Mario Brothers”.
That said, I made a lot of progress on FF XIII a while back. I’m pretty much at the end; I just need some time to sit down and play it (and I need to be in the right mood).
I’ve also added some games to the list, including 3 very, very old games.
Here’s the Ultra Turbo Video Game Stack of Shame 2012 Stack of the Year Edition, ordered by likelihood of me playing them:
- Final Fantasy I
- Final Fantasy XIII
- Bard’s Tale I
- Professor Layton and the Unwound Future
- Final Fantasy IV (PSP or DS version)
- Assassin’s Creed:Brotherhood
- Monkey Island Chapter 5
- Mass Effect 2
- Dragon Age
- The Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess
- Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles
- Final Fantasy IV: The After Years
- New Super Mario Brothers Wii
- Xenosaga II
- Super Mario RPG
- Paper Mario
- Final Fantasy III
- Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories
- Assassin’s Creed Bloodlines
- Bard’s Tale II
- Bard’s Tale III
- Grand Theft Auto IV
This list is depressing. I’ve crossed one game off in since last year, and added 6 more. I’m sure I’m forgetting some too. Sure, we had Julian last year, but that was November. Late November.
That said, here’s what’s happening now. I’m playing a few in parallel, because apparently I prefer to fail at several things at the same time rather than in sequence. Here they are:
- Final Fantasy I: It’s old-school, but it’s a straightforward game. Grinding is the main obstacle, and I’m a patient grinder. I’m early on in this, but I might just stick with it this time. Contrast this with…
- Bard’s Tale I: I know, wtf, right? I’ve been playing the Bard’s Tale games on and off for over 25 years. Partly inspired by The CRPG Addict, I’m going to make a real go at it. These games involve serious grinding, are super-punishing, require mapping by hand (unless you cheat, and what’s the point of that?) and involve a lot of luck. Fortunately, these games are easy to pick up after a break. There’s only a very thin plot and they’re fairly linear. So it might take a long time, but I’m going for it. You might think I’m crazy, but I’ll bet you’re paying attention to this year’s election and you probably don’t think that’s insane, so we’re at a stalemate.
- Final Fantasy XIII: As I mentioned above, I think I’m very, very close to the end. In fact, I think that I’m at the last save point in the game. Next weekend will be busy for me, so I may wait until the following one to really try to beat it. On a related note, I picked up XIII-2 a month or so ago, but I obviously haven’t started it yet, so that’s why it’s not on the list.
- Professor Layton and the Unwound Future: There’s a plot, but it’s basically a casual puzzle game. I can pick it up and set it aside easily.
- Fez: I started this last night. Very fun and clever.
How can I possibly play a video game (let alone 5) with a 5-month baby? Good question. Actually, it’s a good way to unwind in the evening when Julian and Kelly have gone to bed. Of course I have to keep an eye on the clock, and I’m always super-tired. But if I just slept and worked I’d lose my mind. So I give up a little extra sleep for entertainment.
I think Fez is going to distract from FFI and BTI. Still, they’re all on different platforms (FFI is on PSP, BT1 on a mac running Boxer, Layton on DS and Fez on Xbox 360) and I can play them in different situations, so I think it will work out. I might drop Layton and Fez for a while if I get too distracted.
I might try updating this blog frequently with my progress. I’m sure you all want to see my hand-drawn Bard’s Tale dungeon maps.
P.S. Screw GTA IV. I’m still mad about that last stupid mission. I’m sure it wouldn’t be that bad if I really wanted to beat it, but screw that for the foreseeable future.